i put together our application for adoption with adoption advocates international (AAI) last week. i got it mailed off on saturday March 21st. We have requested a daughter from ethiopia aged 0 to 4. the lady at AAI told us if we were willing to take an infant we would get our referral sooner. we were surprised, but happy with that information. we would love another baby. from what she told us there are a lot of babies being found abandoned. ella and jacob are glad that there's a possibility that Carly will be a baby.
we are excited to be underway!
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
carly's first guardian angel
there is one important story i haven't told. it's not only important that i tell it as part of Carly's story, but it's important because it is God working in this adoption journey.
on a sunday in february i went to sunday school ready to share with the members about an idea i had for a fundraiser. at the beginning of the class there were only 2 of us there, me and a man i'd only met a couple times. we used the time alone to get to know each other a bit. after awhile another couple came in and i shared my fundraising idea and told them i only needed to find $200 to start the application process. we brainstormed a bit longer and class was soon over. two weeks later after sunday school the same man i had been talking to handed me an envelope and told me it was a thank you for letting him borrow some dvd's and about something we'd talked about a couple weeks ago. i didn't think much of it as i walked away to check on my kids. after making sure the boys were where they were supposed to be i opened the envelope, even though it was addressed to dave and i both. i'm not known for having any patience. inside was a cute card and another envelope. my first thought was that he had given me some gift certificates for stuff from swiss colony to use for the fundraiser party we had talked about. but, then i realized it was a bank envelope and he had given us the money we needed to start our search. i was freaked out, hands shaking and nervous stomach. i practically ran to dave to tell him before the service started. he was blown away too. i sat in the pew with tears running down my checks as the service began. i was most amazed by this act of faith because i hardly knew this man and he believed in me and what we were doing so strongly that he chose to financially get involved. our first thoughts were that we couldn't accept the gift, but then we realized that the gift wasn't from our new friend, it was from God and it wasn't for us, it was for Carly. it was another nudge from God that we were headed in the right direction, and by the way hurry up and get moving!
on a sunday in february i went to sunday school ready to share with the members about an idea i had for a fundraiser. at the beginning of the class there were only 2 of us there, me and a man i'd only met a couple times. we used the time alone to get to know each other a bit. after awhile another couple came in and i shared my fundraising idea and told them i only needed to find $200 to start the application process. we brainstormed a bit longer and class was soon over. two weeks later after sunday school the same man i had been talking to handed me an envelope and told me it was a thank you for letting him borrow some dvd's and about something we'd talked about a couple weeks ago. i didn't think much of it as i walked away to check on my kids. after making sure the boys were where they were supposed to be i opened the envelope, even though it was addressed to dave and i both. i'm not known for having any patience. inside was a cute card and another envelope. my first thought was that he had given me some gift certificates for stuff from swiss colony to use for the fundraiser party we had talked about. but, then i realized it was a bank envelope and he had given us the money we needed to start our search. i was freaked out, hands shaking and nervous stomach. i practically ran to dave to tell him before the service started. he was blown away too. i sat in the pew with tears running down my checks as the service began. i was most amazed by this act of faith because i hardly knew this man and he believed in me and what we were doing so strongly that he chose to financially get involved. our first thoughts were that we couldn't accept the gift, but then we realized that the gift wasn't from our new friend, it was from God and it wasn't for us, it was for Carly. it was another nudge from God that we were headed in the right direction, and by the way hurry up and get moving!
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
more background
in mid january i filled out a preapplication form for WACAP. we hadn't decided to go with them for sure, but we figured it was the next step in the journey. it was very helpful because a case manager contacted us via email and answered a ton of newbie questions. the biggest thing we learned from her was that the countries that would allow us to adopt a child were russia, kahzakstan and ethiopia. i did some research on the countries and talked some more with the case worker about the countries. we decided to go with ethiopia for a couple reasons. one is that both R and K require you to travel 2-3 times. you meet the child, agree to become their parents and then leave them while they do the paperwork. i couldn't imagine doing that, meeting a child, your child, and then leaving them for a couple months. i talked to Erica B about ethiopia and how that works having a multi racial family. it was amazingly helpful to know that there are support groups for adoptive families "near" here and that the ethiopian community is strong in both madison and chicago. dave and i talked about it and decided that ethiopia just felt right.
so, once we had a country we needed to be sure we had found the right placement agency and also find a local agency for home study and post placement interviews. my step mom cheryl has an associate/friend who works for an episcopal charities agency that does adoption, St. Mary's. i did lots of research on wacap as well as AAI (adoption advocates international). AAI is the agency Erica's family used and she highly recommended them. in the very beginning of our journey we assumed it would be easier for us to find a special needs child toddler that needed a home and WACAP has a very strong waiting child program. as it turns out that isn't the case. for the country that we've selected there aren't many special needs children available. in fact right now, AAI, is placing a lot of infants. after dave and i talked about it we decided that AAI is the right way to go, because we both would really prefer a baby and if homes are needed for infants more so than toddlers that is obviously the right way to go.
my next step is to fill out the application and gather the photo, pay stubs, wedding certificate and insurance info they need and send it off. this is getting very exciting! if everything goes smoothly she could be here in one year! we've covered some ground and i have some answers to our initial questions. i know where she is, and i know she wasn't born when i wrote those other posts and may not even be born yet. i am already looking forward to receiving the placement phone call!
so, once we had a country we needed to be sure we had found the right placement agency and also find a local agency for home study and post placement interviews. my step mom cheryl has an associate/friend who works for an episcopal charities agency that does adoption, St. Mary's. i did lots of research on wacap as well as AAI (adoption advocates international). AAI is the agency Erica's family used and she highly recommended them. in the very beginning of our journey we assumed it would be easier for us to find a special needs child toddler that needed a home and WACAP has a very strong waiting child program. as it turns out that isn't the case. for the country that we've selected there aren't many special needs children available. in fact right now, AAI, is placing a lot of infants. after dave and i talked about it we decided that AAI is the right way to go, because we both would really prefer a baby and if homes are needed for infants more so than toddlers that is obviously the right way to go.
my next step is to fill out the application and gather the photo, pay stubs, wedding certificate and insurance info they need and send it off. this is getting very exciting! if everything goes smoothly she could be here in one year! we've covered some ground and i have some answers to our initial questions. i know where she is, and i know she wasn't born when i wrote those other posts and may not even be born yet. i am already looking forward to receiving the placement phone call!
Monday, March 9, 2009
my walk to emmaus
this is another post from a personal blog of mine. it is another testimony that adoption is very much a God thing for us. it was written on August 14, 2008.
wow. what an event. before i went i talked to a few people who'd already attended a weekend and no one could really explain what it was like. i thought they were being secretive but i realize now that it is unexplainable. there are a few surprises throughout the weekend that help to define God's love for you and it's best to keep them as a surprise. to enjoy them as they come and not to anticipate. for me that is very hard to do. my table leaders thought i knew too much about the event, but i think they were wrong. i only knew a few things about the make up of the event. i knew that there were attendees that had been there before, people who were there to serve the "pilgrims" during the weekend. i knew that there were talks each day that helped you to understand God a little better and to help you figure out where you are on your walk with God. and i knew a little bit about Agape. but, the outpouring of huge acts of Agape, the surprises, i had no idea about. they were huge. i felt God's love all around me. and i am positive that my experience wouldn't have been any different or less powerful, if i hadn't known those things. dave did a very good job of telling me enough to give my inquisitive self an idea of what i was getting into, but not ruining the surprises.
i decided to go on the weekend because i wanted to be closer to God. i wanted to make sure i was on the right track. i prayed a lot for revelation, for clarity, and i got it. i have found in my spiritual life that God will totally meet you where you are and give you what you need as you need it. He gently reminded me that my priorities were out of wack. that i was spending way to much time on things of little importance. so, i vowed to limit the time spent on those things, and to spend more time on christian study and taking care of my children, husband and home. not because i am their servant, but because that is how i serve God. by taking care of the blessings he has given me. i have also been struggling with feelings of being led by God to adopt a child. He keeps pulling me in that direction, it is strongly in my heart, but i keep questioning it. i try to reason with Him, we don't have enough space, or enough time, or enough money. but, still He pulls me. i know he will provide, but in my human-ness i worry about my abilities. during the weekend on sunday i was feeling homesick and missing my family very much. during one of the talks i found my mind wandering. i didn't want that to happen, i wanted to get as much out of the weekend as possible so i began to pray. i asked God what i could possible get out of that talk. what it was he had left to tell me that weekend. the idea of adoption came to me and my thoughts of doubt. i heard God in my mind say "Find Her". what? i questioned, really? i don't think you really mean it. how can i possibly? "FIND HER" i heard it again. there was no doubt. He really meant it. i don't know where she is. i don't know if she's born yet. but, i do know i need to find her. i need to give the problems to God and let him find the answers.
on sunday evening i wanted desperately for dave to be there to pick me up. i wanted so much to see him and talk to him about my experience and to hug him. but, they encouraged us to not use our phones, so i didn't call and ask him to come. although it was really hard not to. so imagine my delight when he was there waiting for me.
wow. what an event. before i went i talked to a few people who'd already attended a weekend and no one could really explain what it was like. i thought they were being secretive but i realize now that it is unexplainable. there are a few surprises throughout the weekend that help to define God's love for you and it's best to keep them as a surprise. to enjoy them as they come and not to anticipate. for me that is very hard to do. my table leaders thought i knew too much about the event, but i think they were wrong. i only knew a few things about the make up of the event. i knew that there were attendees that had been there before, people who were there to serve the "pilgrims" during the weekend. i knew that there were talks each day that helped you to understand God a little better and to help you figure out where you are on your walk with God. and i knew a little bit about Agape. but, the outpouring of huge acts of Agape, the surprises, i had no idea about. they were huge. i felt God's love all around me. and i am positive that my experience wouldn't have been any different or less powerful, if i hadn't known those things. dave did a very good job of telling me enough to give my inquisitive self an idea of what i was getting into, but not ruining the surprises.
i decided to go on the weekend because i wanted to be closer to God. i wanted to make sure i was on the right track. i prayed a lot for revelation, for clarity, and i got it. i have found in my spiritual life that God will totally meet you where you are and give you what you need as you need it. He gently reminded me that my priorities were out of wack. that i was spending way to much time on things of little importance. so, i vowed to limit the time spent on those things, and to spend more time on christian study and taking care of my children, husband and home. not because i am their servant, but because that is how i serve God. by taking care of the blessings he has given me. i have also been struggling with feelings of being led by God to adopt a child. He keeps pulling me in that direction, it is strongly in my heart, but i keep questioning it. i try to reason with Him, we don't have enough space, or enough time, or enough money. but, still He pulls me. i know he will provide, but in my human-ness i worry about my abilities. during the weekend on sunday i was feeling homesick and missing my family very much. during one of the talks i found my mind wandering. i didn't want that to happen, i wanted to get as much out of the weekend as possible so i began to pray. i asked God what i could possible get out of that talk. what it was he had left to tell me that weekend. the idea of adoption came to me and my thoughts of doubt. i heard God in my mind say "Find Her". what? i questioned, really? i don't think you really mean it. how can i possibly? "FIND HER" i heard it again. there was no doubt. He really meant it. i don't know where she is. i don't know if she's born yet. but, i do know i need to find her. i need to give the problems to God and let him find the answers.
on sunday evening i wanted desperately for dave to be there to pick me up. i wanted so much to see him and talk to him about my experience and to hug him. but, they encouraged us to not use our phones, so i didn't call and ask him to come. although it was really hard not to. so imagine my delight when he was there waiting for me.
our journey to carly
dave and i have decided we want to document our journey to find our Caroline on this blog. we want to remember every step of the way. the ups and the downs. so that she knows how hard we fought to find her and how God intended for her to be a part of our family.
the following post is from a personal blog of mine. it was the first time i wrote about adoption. it was written on march 3, 2008.
i've been thinking of adoption lately. it's not in my head daily, but once a week or so. two weeks ago in our small group the question we were discussing was about God leading us in our lives. is it easy to hear Him? do we follow? i told the group that i felt lead to adopt a little girl. but, that i wasn't sure if it was my desire or if it was God's plan for me.
fast forward to tonight. there is a wednesday night lenten service at our church. that is where i shared my faith story last week (it went well by the way). tonight, a pastor from embury UMC shared his faith story. i knew him a little from our small group training, so i knew about his story a bit. the part i didn't know was that he and his wife had adopted a girl from china a while ago and are in the process of adopting another one now. after the service i went over to talk to him about adoption. i told him i felt called to do adopt a child also. i told him i was so compelled that we had already picked a name for her. he told me that his wife was an advocate for adoption and told me she would love to talk to me. he gave me her email address and then told me her name was caroline. tears sprang to me eyes and my hand covered my mouth. i was shocked. he told me a few more things and then i shared with him that caroline/carly was the name we had chosen. he took off his glasses and wiped the tears from his eyes. he said "wow". it was what paster john calls a God Shot, a undeniable moment where God talks to you. God does want us to adopt. it is his plan. he sent us a caroline to help us find our carly. it just blows me away. i needed clarity and this was it. i am freaked out. i still have no idea how long it will take or where she is or if she's even born. i have way more questions than answers. but, it is my path. wow.
the following post is from a personal blog of mine. it was the first time i wrote about adoption. it was written on march 3, 2008.
i've been thinking of adoption lately. it's not in my head daily, but once a week or so. two weeks ago in our small group the question we were discussing was about God leading us in our lives. is it easy to hear Him? do we follow? i told the group that i felt lead to adopt a little girl. but, that i wasn't sure if it was my desire or if it was God's plan for me.
fast forward to tonight. there is a wednesday night lenten service at our church. that is where i shared my faith story last week (it went well by the way). tonight, a pastor from embury UMC shared his faith story. i knew him a little from our small group training, so i knew about his story a bit. the part i didn't know was that he and his wife had adopted a girl from china a while ago and are in the process of adopting another one now. after the service i went over to talk to him about adoption. i told him i felt called to do adopt a child also. i told him i was so compelled that we had already picked a name for her. he told me that his wife was an advocate for adoption and told me she would love to talk to me. he gave me her email address and then told me her name was caroline. tears sprang to me eyes and my hand covered my mouth. i was shocked. he told me a few more things and then i shared with him that caroline/carly was the name we had chosen. he took off his glasses and wiped the tears from his eyes. he said "wow". it was what paster john calls a God Shot, a undeniable moment where God talks to you. God does want us to adopt. it is his plan. he sent us a caroline to help us find our carly. it just blows me away. i needed clarity and this was it. i am freaked out. i still have no idea how long it will take or where she is or if she's even born. i have way more questions than answers. but, it is my path. wow.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
all in a days work
today I:
took care of one sickie
got 2 littles ready for the day
clipped 20 fingernails
unloaded the dishwasher
loaded the dishwasher
cut and added a cardboard divider into the dog food bin - 2 kinds of food
vacuumed the first floor
put 1 little down for a nap
steamed cleaned the basement carpet
caught a cricket to feed to ds's praying mantis
baked a batch of cookies
ran to the store for a couple things with 3 kids in tow
picked up ds from school
took dd to ballet
cooked a frozen pizza for dinner
took the puppy outside for countless potty breaks
cleaned up several potty "accidents" from puppy anyway
walked/ran a mile on the treadmill
hosted small group at our house
and very few of these things were on my actual list. the list that keeps growing. there are always calls to make and cleaning to get done. but, ds might actually remember that his momma took a couple minutes to go outside and catch him a cricket. i doubt he'll care if i ever get around to making an appointment to get my hair cut and colored. a girl's gotta have priorities.
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